vugana n’umukobwa kuri telefone bishobora kugora abahungu bamwe, cyane iyo uwo bavugisha bamutinya cyangwa bashaka kumutereta. Nyamara hari ibintu bimwe na bimwe bishobora gufasha umuhungu kuvugana neza n’umukobwa kuri telefone kandi ikiganiro bagirana kikagenda neza cyane.
Muri iyi minsi, kuvugana n’umuntu binyuze kuri telefone ni imwe mu nzira zikomeye zifashishwa mu guteza imbere imibanire hagati y’abantu. By’umwihariko, hagati y’abahungu n’abakobwa (abasore n’inkumi) ho ikoreshwa rya telefone rifite akamaro kanini cyane.
Abakundana, by’umwihariko, bakunze kwifashisha iri koranabuhanga bahamagarana ndetse banabwirana utugambo tw’urukundo ‘Imitoma’.
Gusa abagitangira kumenyana bo hari igihe rimwe na rimwe bibagora.
Muri iyi nkuru turabagezaho noneho ibyafasha umuhungu ushaka kugirana n’umukobwa ikiganiro binyuze kuri telefone kandi akagera ku ntego yo ‘kuryohereza’ uwo aganiriza.
Ikintu cya mbere cyagufasha nk’umuhungu ni ukwiha umutuzo. Mbere y’uko utangira guhamagara, banza wihe umutuzo mu mubiri wawe, ntutangire gushya ubwoba no kubira ibyuya, uhangayika ngo uravuga iki cyangwa urabyitwramo ute. Igirire icyizere wumve ko bishoboka.
Ikintu cya kabiri ugomba gukora niba wumva utiyizeye ijana ku ijana ni ukwandika ku gapapuro ibyo wumva ukeneye kuza kumubwira(cyane iyo mutaramenyerana ngo munamenyane birambuye). Ibi bigufasha ko n’igihe mwaba muganira ukumva ubuze icyo umubwira (kagacika nk’uko babivuga), uhita wifashisha ya ‘mfashanyigisho’ yawe ukabasha kuzahura ikiganiro cyari kigiye gupfa. Guceceka bituma ikiganiro kibiha kandi bishobora gutuma uwo muvugana (ni ukuvuga umukobwa) ahita agusezera kuko nyine aba abona ko wabuze ibyo umubwira.
Inyuma y’ibi, hakurikiraho igice cy’ingenzi kandi cya ngombwa cyo kuba uwo uriwe. Igihe mwatangiye ikiganiro cyanyu, tangirira ku tuntu tworoheje ubundi wuririreho umubaza n’ibindi. Niba ageze aho akavuga ibintu bikwerekeye mu buzima busanzwe, wimuca mu ijambo, mureke arangize interuro ye ubundi umusubize akakuri ku mutima. Gusa uzirinde gushaka kubikora nk’uko abandi babikora. Ba uwo uri we, umusubize nkawe ubwawe kandi umuhe ibisubizo ukuye ku mutima. Ikiganiro gikozwe muri ubu buryo gishobora kuryoha ku buryo mwamara n’amasaha menshi mutararambirwa kuvugana.
Iyo ikiganiro kimaze kuryoha, uzirinde gutangira kureba ku isaha. Reka ikiganiro gikomeze muze kugisoreza aho wumva koko kigomba gusorezwa. Ntikigere aho kiryoshye ngo utangire gusezera kandi wenda wariwo mwanya wo kuvuga akakuri ku mutima. Niba ufite n’ikibazo cy’amafaranga muri telefone, kora ku buryo uwo munsi ushyiramo ahagije ku buryo niyo byaba ngombwa ko mumara iminota myinshi muganira bitaza kugera aho biryoshye ngo byikupe. Gucikiriza ikiganiro cyangwa gutangira kuvuga ngo umaze igihe kirekire uvugana n’umukobwa kuri telefone bishobora kubishya ikiganiro kandi nyamara cyagombaga kuryoha. Gusa nanone uzirinde kugira ikiganiro kirekire cyane kuko bishobora gutuma akurambirwa.
Mu bindi impuguke zivuga ko byagufasha ni ukwirinda guhamagara umukobwa mu masaha ya ninjoro cyane (burya ngo abakobwa ntibabikunda), ukirinda gushaka gusobanura ibintu byose (kuko utazapfa ubirangije), kandi ukanagerageza byibuze kuryoshya ikiganiro mu minota ya mbere y’ikiganiro (ku buryo ashobora no guseka kubera kwishima). Ibi ngo nta kabuza bizagufasha kugira ikiganiro kiryoshye.
Kuganira ni inzira ikomeye (kandi ishobora kuba iya mbere) yo gukuza umubano hagati y’abantu, by’umwihariko hagati y’umusore n’inkumi. Bityo rero, uko mugirana ikiganiro kikamunyura, niko nawe azagenda akwibonamo ndetse bikanatuma buri gihe uko umuhamagaye akwitabana umuneza n’umunezero.
Ujye unagerageza kumwoherereza ubutumwa (haba kuri telefone cyangwa ubutumwa bundi bwanditse nko ku rupapuro, carte postale, …) kuko nabyo bifasha gukuza umubano.
Uru ni urubuga rwo kunguraniraho ibitekerezo ku myororokere n'imibereho y'abantu b'ingeri zose ndetse tukanamenyeraho abantu bakoze udukoryo mu gihe turimo
mercredi 30 mars 2011
Abanzi barindwi ba buri couple
Buri Couple iba ifite ibintu biyiteza imbere yihariye ariko kandi ikagira n’ibindi biyibuza amahoro , bikayibangamira mu mibereho yayo… Ntabwo ari ibintu bitangaje: niba muri mwembi, buri wese afite ibyo yanga akagira n’ibyo akunda, birumvikana ko mwembi hari ibishobora kubageraho bikabashimisha kimwe n’uko bishobora no kuba ari ibibahungabanya.
Kugira ngo rero urukundo rwanyu rutere imbere, rugire aho rugera, ntiwirirwe ufata umwanya ujya gushakira muri byinshi, wikwirirwa ukoresha amafaranga y’ikirenga wubaka urukundo cyangwa urusana, ahubwo wowe gerageza kururinda ibintu bishobora kurwangiza.
Ese uzabwirwa n’iki ibyo bintu?
Aha turakwereka ibintu birindwi biri mu bituma urukundo rwanyu rucumbagira, bitangira ari bitoya ariko mutarebye neza bishobora gutuma ruhagarara da! Nta kindi wakora rero usibye kubyirinda ukanabirinda umukunzi wawe, mwembi mukabigendera kure, bityo mukaba murinze ururkundo rwanyu.
1. Televiziyo
Muzarebe namwe nk’iyo hari filimi za seri (series), ukava ku kazi mbere yo kubaza uko abo mu rugo biriwe ugahita uhitira kuri televiziyo, cyangwa ari mu gihe cy’imipira ya champion’s League cyangwa cya Cecafa,… biri mu bintu bibangamira abakundana pe!
Kujya ku meza wicaye imbere ya Televiziyo kabone n’aho mwaba murimo kureba ibintu mwembi bibashimishije iyo bibaye buri gihe bituma nta mwihariko w’ibiganiro byanyu mugirana, ugatuma nta mwanya mufata ngo muganire, mwitekerezeho. Mu gihe na mwe mubibona ko koko ibabangamiye, itagituma mufata umwanya wo kuganira, mushobora kwemeranyaho igihe muzajya muyicana, inshuro zingahe se mu cyumweru, ku munsi se… ariko mukagerageza kwisigira umwanya muto wo kujya muganira kuko iyo bitagenze gutya, mushiduka mwembi mumeze nk’abataziranye, n’uburyo mwisanzuranaho bikagenda bishira burundu.
2. Guhora mu bintu bimwe
Ya restaurant mwakundaga gusohokeramo, rya funguro mwakundaga gusangira, ha hantu hose mwakundaga gutemberera,… muri make bya bindi byose mwajyaga mukunda, bya bindi byose byajyaga bibashishikaza, byose mwarabyibagiwe, mwarabitaye,… ubu musigaye mubana nk’abantu bamenyeranye bihorera mu bintu bimwe, nta mwihariko wanyu mufite, nta gashya mu rukundo rwanyu kandi urukundo ni nk’ururabyo rusaba guhora ruvomerwa, ibi nabyo biri mu bituma couple irananirwa, igacumbagira byarimba ndetse ikaba yanahagarara burundu.
3. Gukora amasaha arenga ayo mwagombaga
Rekera aho gutaha bwije, bitari uko gusa nawe ubwawe nta gihe wiha ahubwo kuko n’uwo ukunda nta mwanya na muke ukimuha. Gerageza kuva ku masaha wakoraga nibura ukureho nk’abiri ukomeze kugera ubwo uzumva nawe ubwawe usigaye ubona umwanya wo kuruhuka. Impamvu y’ibi rero si no kugira ngo uruhuke gusa, nta n’ubwo impamvu bibangamira umukunzi wawe ari uko atakikubona gusa, ahubwo ni uko iyo umaze igihe ukora cyane utaruhuka n’ibiganiro byawe ubwabyo biba ari ibyerekeranye n’akazi kawe gusa, bityo ugasanga ariko konyine uha umwanya mu buzima bwawe, umukunzi wawe ntiyongere kubona umwanya mu buzima bwawe.
4. Kutiyitaho
Kuba umaranye igihe kinini n’umukunzi wawe, ntibivuze ko bihagije; kuba kandi akuzi neza agukunda uko uri - ibyiza byawe n’ibibi byawe- ntibivuze ko bihagije nta kindi ushobora gukora. Si byiza ko ujya mu bwiherero ugasiga udasutsemo amazi ngo ni uko mujya no gukundana ariko wari umeze yabyihanganiye, nta n’ubwo ari byiza ko musohokana utikozeho, ngo wambare neza, usokoze imisatsi yawe neza, ku buryo buri munsi abona impamvu yo kugumana nawe, ku buryo n’abandi bakureba koko bakabona ko afite umukunzi mwiza. Ni ngombwa kumwereka ko ari umuntu w’agaciro imbere yawe ku buryo buri gihe uba ugomba kwishimira kuba ari uwawe ukabimwereka umuha agaciro akwiye koko.
5. Kumwima agaciro
Mu bintu bya mbere bibangamira couple, harimo kuba udaha agaciro umukunzi wawe.
Aha sinshatse kuvuga kumugurira impano gusa, kumuha indabyo nziza z’amaroze, ibi byose si byo byonyine byereka umukunzi wawe ko umuhaye agaciro. Ahubwo, wenda niba muri kumwe, jya umureba umwereke ko n’ubu utarumva uburyo yakwemereye ko utura mu mutima we; birahagije ko umenya kandi ukamubwira ikintu cyose gishya cyamubayeho, niba yambaye umwenda mushya, niba avuye muri salon de coiffure, ugahita ubibona kandi ukabimubwira; ntugatinye kumubwira igihe ubona asa neza cyangwa yambaye neza, ntugatinye na rimwe kumubwira icyo umutekerezaho cyane cyane iyo ari cyiza kandi ubona ko gishobora kumwubaka.
6. Gufuha birenze urugero
Burya iyo ukunda umuntu ni ngombwa ko umufuhira, ariko na bwo iyo urengereye ntibiba bikiri byiza.
Rekera aho kumucunga no kumucungisha abandi, si umujura. Rekera aho gucunga ubutumwa bugufi yakiriye kuri telefoni ye, rekera aho gucunga email zamwandikiwe n’izo yanditse. Jya umenya ko ikintu cy’ingenzi mu rukundo ari icyizere kandi mwese mukakigirirana. Iyo ukomeje kumwereka ko utamwizeye, agera aho akaruha na we akagera aho akumva ntaryohewe bityo rwose akaba yanisangira undi umuha amahoro.
7. Kwifata bikabije
Kumenya imibereho ya couple yanyu burya ni ingenzi kandi birabareba mwese. Rimwe na rimwe hari ibintu biba bidakwiye gukorwa nk’ umugenzo. Iyo abantu bakundana cyane cyane abamaze kubana dore ko ari nabo baba babyemerewe, ni byiza ko bakorana imibonano mpuzabitsina. Burya si ngombwa ko buri joro uko mugiye kuryama mutangira kubonana, nta n’ubwo ari formule rwose kuko iki ni igikorwa gikorwa iyo buri wese abyiyumvamo, bitari uko ari formule. Niba utabyiyumvamo aho kugira ngo ubikore nabi, wabireka rwose ariko kandi mujye mugerageza mwembi, mumenye igihe mwumva mwese mubishaka. Gusa ntimugahore mu bintu bimwe hato mutazarambirwa ahubwo nimugerageze guhindura uburyo mubikoramo, mugerageze kubwizanya ukuri ibishimisha buri wese, mugerageze guhindura igihe, kuko burya iyo bihora ari bimwe nta gashya, mugera aho mukarambirwa. Nimugerageze mwumve ko ari igikorwa muha agaciro. Nko mu bihugu byateye imbere ho, hari igihe abakunzi bava mu gihugu bakajya mu kindi, mu mugabane bakajya mu wundi, ariko kugira ngo urukundo rwabo ruhore ari rushya nta bintu bihoraho kandi birambirana bakora.
Source:igitondo.com
Kugira ngo rero urukundo rwanyu rutere imbere, rugire aho rugera, ntiwirirwe ufata umwanya ujya gushakira muri byinshi, wikwirirwa ukoresha amafaranga y’ikirenga wubaka urukundo cyangwa urusana, ahubwo wowe gerageza kururinda ibintu bishobora kurwangiza.
Ese uzabwirwa n’iki ibyo bintu?
Aha turakwereka ibintu birindwi biri mu bituma urukundo rwanyu rucumbagira, bitangira ari bitoya ariko mutarebye neza bishobora gutuma ruhagarara da! Nta kindi wakora rero usibye kubyirinda ukanabirinda umukunzi wawe, mwembi mukabigendera kure, bityo mukaba murinze ururkundo rwanyu.
1. Televiziyo
Muzarebe namwe nk’iyo hari filimi za seri (series), ukava ku kazi mbere yo kubaza uko abo mu rugo biriwe ugahita uhitira kuri televiziyo, cyangwa ari mu gihe cy’imipira ya champion’s League cyangwa cya Cecafa,… biri mu bintu bibangamira abakundana pe!
Kujya ku meza wicaye imbere ya Televiziyo kabone n’aho mwaba murimo kureba ibintu mwembi bibashimishije iyo bibaye buri gihe bituma nta mwihariko w’ibiganiro byanyu mugirana, ugatuma nta mwanya mufata ngo muganire, mwitekerezeho. Mu gihe na mwe mubibona ko koko ibabangamiye, itagituma mufata umwanya wo kuganira, mushobora kwemeranyaho igihe muzajya muyicana, inshuro zingahe se mu cyumweru, ku munsi se… ariko mukagerageza kwisigira umwanya muto wo kujya muganira kuko iyo bitagenze gutya, mushiduka mwembi mumeze nk’abataziranye, n’uburyo mwisanzuranaho bikagenda bishira burundu.
2. Guhora mu bintu bimwe
Ya restaurant mwakundaga gusohokeramo, rya funguro mwakundaga gusangira, ha hantu hose mwakundaga gutemberera,… muri make bya bindi byose mwajyaga mukunda, bya bindi byose byajyaga bibashishikaza, byose mwarabyibagiwe, mwarabitaye,… ubu musigaye mubana nk’abantu bamenyeranye bihorera mu bintu bimwe, nta mwihariko wanyu mufite, nta gashya mu rukundo rwanyu kandi urukundo ni nk’ururabyo rusaba guhora ruvomerwa, ibi nabyo biri mu bituma couple irananirwa, igacumbagira byarimba ndetse ikaba yanahagarara burundu.
3. Gukora amasaha arenga ayo mwagombaga
Rekera aho gutaha bwije, bitari uko gusa nawe ubwawe nta gihe wiha ahubwo kuko n’uwo ukunda nta mwanya na muke ukimuha. Gerageza kuva ku masaha wakoraga nibura ukureho nk’abiri ukomeze kugera ubwo uzumva nawe ubwawe usigaye ubona umwanya wo kuruhuka. Impamvu y’ibi rero si no kugira ngo uruhuke gusa, nta n’ubwo impamvu bibangamira umukunzi wawe ari uko atakikubona gusa, ahubwo ni uko iyo umaze igihe ukora cyane utaruhuka n’ibiganiro byawe ubwabyo biba ari ibyerekeranye n’akazi kawe gusa, bityo ugasanga ariko konyine uha umwanya mu buzima bwawe, umukunzi wawe ntiyongere kubona umwanya mu buzima bwawe.
4. Kutiyitaho
Kuba umaranye igihe kinini n’umukunzi wawe, ntibivuze ko bihagije; kuba kandi akuzi neza agukunda uko uri - ibyiza byawe n’ibibi byawe- ntibivuze ko bihagije nta kindi ushobora gukora. Si byiza ko ujya mu bwiherero ugasiga udasutsemo amazi ngo ni uko mujya no gukundana ariko wari umeze yabyihanganiye, nta n’ubwo ari byiza ko musohokana utikozeho, ngo wambare neza, usokoze imisatsi yawe neza, ku buryo buri munsi abona impamvu yo kugumana nawe, ku buryo n’abandi bakureba koko bakabona ko afite umukunzi mwiza. Ni ngombwa kumwereka ko ari umuntu w’agaciro imbere yawe ku buryo buri gihe uba ugomba kwishimira kuba ari uwawe ukabimwereka umuha agaciro akwiye koko.
5. Kumwima agaciro
Mu bintu bya mbere bibangamira couple, harimo kuba udaha agaciro umukunzi wawe.
Aha sinshatse kuvuga kumugurira impano gusa, kumuha indabyo nziza z’amaroze, ibi byose si byo byonyine byereka umukunzi wawe ko umuhaye agaciro. Ahubwo, wenda niba muri kumwe, jya umureba umwereke ko n’ubu utarumva uburyo yakwemereye ko utura mu mutima we; birahagije ko umenya kandi ukamubwira ikintu cyose gishya cyamubayeho, niba yambaye umwenda mushya, niba avuye muri salon de coiffure, ugahita ubibona kandi ukabimubwira; ntugatinye kumubwira igihe ubona asa neza cyangwa yambaye neza, ntugatinye na rimwe kumubwira icyo umutekerezaho cyane cyane iyo ari cyiza kandi ubona ko gishobora kumwubaka.
6. Gufuha birenze urugero
Burya iyo ukunda umuntu ni ngombwa ko umufuhira, ariko na bwo iyo urengereye ntibiba bikiri byiza.
Rekera aho kumucunga no kumucungisha abandi, si umujura. Rekera aho gucunga ubutumwa bugufi yakiriye kuri telefoni ye, rekera aho gucunga email zamwandikiwe n’izo yanditse. Jya umenya ko ikintu cy’ingenzi mu rukundo ari icyizere kandi mwese mukakigirirana. Iyo ukomeje kumwereka ko utamwizeye, agera aho akaruha na we akagera aho akumva ntaryohewe bityo rwose akaba yanisangira undi umuha amahoro.
7. Kwifata bikabije
Kumenya imibereho ya couple yanyu burya ni ingenzi kandi birabareba mwese. Rimwe na rimwe hari ibintu biba bidakwiye gukorwa nk’ umugenzo. Iyo abantu bakundana cyane cyane abamaze kubana dore ko ari nabo baba babyemerewe, ni byiza ko bakorana imibonano mpuzabitsina. Burya si ngombwa ko buri joro uko mugiye kuryama mutangira kubonana, nta n’ubwo ari formule rwose kuko iki ni igikorwa gikorwa iyo buri wese abyiyumvamo, bitari uko ari formule. Niba utabyiyumvamo aho kugira ngo ubikore nabi, wabireka rwose ariko kandi mujye mugerageza mwembi, mumenye igihe mwumva mwese mubishaka. Gusa ntimugahore mu bintu bimwe hato mutazarambirwa ahubwo nimugerageze guhindura uburyo mubikoramo, mugerageze kubwizanya ukuri ibishimisha buri wese, mugerageze guhindura igihe, kuko burya iyo bihora ari bimwe nta gashya, mugera aho mukarambirwa. Nimugerageze mwumve ko ari igikorwa muha agaciro. Nko mu bihugu byateye imbere ho, hari igihe abakunzi bava mu gihugu bakajya mu kindi, mu mugabane bakajya mu wundi, ariko kugira ngo urukundo rwabo ruhore ari rushya nta bintu bihoraho kandi birambirana bakora.
Source:igitondo.com
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